Wait and Weight

Tuesday is my next scan, a CT of the chest, pelvis and abdomen. For the most part I get a bit nervous before and after the scans, until I receive the results, then I'm back to living again.

I feel pretty confident going into the scan though. I've been feeling stronger and stronger, and I don't seem to have any symptoms outside those caused by the chemotherapy. But you just never know. Cancer is a sneaky little devil.

This is also that time of year when everything has come to the forefront in the past. So there's a little bit of voodoo that hangs in the air. I just want to put my head down get through the next couple weeks with no evidence of further disease and I'll be filled with confidence.

Beyond waiting for those scan results, I'm also very dedicated right now to tackling my weight loss. My appetite is great. I'm eating very well. Yet still my weight continues to trickle downwards. I've been patient about it, thinking that it would take a little time to turn the weight loss around and begin to gain. But I'm losing my patience.

I mean yesterday I ate big again. I think I ate more than most ate in a normal day. But still the weight slowly trickles down. My vast medical knowledge (ahem) tells me that there is something about the chemo that is blocking the gas from getting to the car. It's going to be a major subject for me when I meet with the oncologist the second week of March.

I'm eating well. I'm exercising. I mean come on! The doc hinted that we may be able to use a steroid to help the weight gain along. Woohoo! Another pill in my daily diet!

I guess if steroids and human growth hormones are good enough for our sports' stars than they're good enough for me huh?

So it's wait and weight. I'll wait for my test results. And I'll find answers to the weight loss. Either way I'll be waking up every day and fighting this thing. Against all odds, I'm still determined to beat it.