Killers Inside

I take two chemo pills in the morning and two in the evening. The chemo seeks out cancer growth areas and tries to suffocate those areas' blood supply. Cancer growth areas typically use more blood and exhibit certain chemical profiles. But the chemo cannot perfectly distinquish between cancer areas and regular areas. So sometimes regular areas get attacked too.

It's an interesting lottery draw each day. The chemo adds an unpredictable pit bull inside you, and you never know from day-to-day what mood the pit bull is going to be in, or what he may or may not be attacking on this day.

Taking chemo, in general, and at the least, makes you feel like you have a little touch of the flu each day. You walk a little slower, react a little slower, feel a little sluggish, ache a little bit here and there.

The recent oral forms of chemotherapy have many advantages. You can take it in the convenience of your home rather than visiting the hospital once-a-week for the IV. The side effects are generally less than many IV treatments.

But...the IV treatments always have an end. The oral chemotherapy never stops. Once you're on this type of chemotherapy you're on it for good, or until it stops working.

I'm learning to deal with it. The exercising is off to a slow, but steady start, and it helps continue to build my energy. But occasionally the chemo will call for a timeout, a nap, and the chemo can be very convincing.

We've controlled any blistering and soreness that often breaks out in the hands and feet. The feet get covered in Aquaphor every morning and that seems to do the trick.

And with enough of the right medications each day and the right foods, the digestive track is generally staying calm and reacting in a more expected manner.

The chemo definitely lets loose the little killers inside.

I wonder what they're attacking right now?