Only Two Good Days This Week

In the past few months, the doctor started talking to Barb and I about thinking more of "quality of life" rather than "quantity of life."

He caught me a little by surprise.

My attitude has been that cancer will have to take me fighting, every step, the entire way. "I'm not giving in."

He assured me that he wasn't giving up either.

But I did think about what he said. I put myself in his shoes. If I had a kidney cancer patient who was punished on chemo for nearly four-years with little overall benefit would I of good conscience continue to beat this poor man with harsh drugs without at least some relief?

I understood what he was saying.

And then he suggested we just try a drug called Interferon. It has been the harshest, hardest, meanest, most terrible drug I've ever experienced. When Barb originally looked up all the side-effects from the drug and page of info should have just read," This drug will pound you into the ground and then jump up and down on your head.

This choice had certainly not followed the "quality of life not quantity of life" credo.

It caused me to miss Thanksgiving with my family and a visit with Lynn who was up from Florida. I had called the doctor and discussed getting away from the drug. He suggested we try it only once aweek instead of three times per week. This sounded very possible. So I tried that schedule for the past two-weeks. Now I'm in some of the worst shape I've ever been.

My eyes have gone pretty whacky. My digestion is way off. My body mass has completely shrunken down to skin and bone and cost me 40-pounds. The Interferon causes me odd and quite random pains. And more...

Barb and I have discussed plans. We're going to cancel the Interferon treatments. There's just nothing that has to do with "quality of life" there. We want to get my self in a healthier standing again. And then we want to have a good discussion with the doctor when we're scheduled to meet in about 2-weeks.

We hope the doctor will order scans of the brain, upper spine, chest, abdomen, and pelvis. That is quite a few. We're got some catching up to do.

We also hope that the doc will agree with out idea to try a new kidney cancer drug that was released very recently.

Sorry I've been out of sorts - and out of touch!